Monday, May 31, 2010

Natural birth...TOO HARD! Who says....?

Had a a great comment on my last post....Thanks ( you know who u r!) Again, a smart independent woman discusses with her OB the desire to birth her baby "naturally, pain med free." The response????

Well, he described it as "Too Hard". No one does least not in "his or her" practice.

Once again, another great woman sprinting out of an obstetrical office.......she found her way to a place that worked with her and she did exactly as she desired and knew she was capable of!

Well, I have seen the environment in many hospitals, and it is so unfortunate that it is difficult to accomplish a drug-free birth. Well, maybe if it is your 2nd or 3rd baby.....but your first takes so much guidance and love and support from women who are there totally for you! A great midwife or OB or OB nurse is someone who when they step into that birth environment is completely and utterly there for you and you only.......ego has to stay behind, way behind.

So, I guess in some cases that OB is is too hard when you are not supported and guided through the process. When you are made to believe that induction of your labor is right and the best thing for you and your baby when you hit your due date ( unless there is a true medical indication for it and sometimes there really is.......)

And, please believe me when I say that I know that all this I speak and preach about natural birth is only in the realm of the "machinery working the way it was planned". Sometimes it doesn't. When that happens there are not too many women who could get through rough, difficult " dysfunctional" labors. They are extremely hard...........and sometimes mommies need help. I always say there is the "pain of labor" and then there is suffering........never a need to suffer. Ever. Let's get help and move on to the birth of your baby, however the little one is supposed to be born. And you know what? It always seems to work out exactly how it was supposed to unfold. We just have to be flexible, listen well, feel our instincts down deep in our bellies and do the best we all can. For now.........Janet

Friday, May 28, 2010

Birth Team vs Birth Dictator

OB office in my neighborhood : Woman says to her OB, " What about a birth plan?"

OB says, " Oh, 'WE' don't do those here. We have you go to the hospital and start the Pitocin."

Woman says, "Well, what if I really want to try to do without Pitocin. What if I want to try
things like standing up, walking, ( etc- you know what she's asking.....)

OB says, "Well, if you are not going to do what we say, you cannot be a patient of ours...." (Take that!) Team mindset, or dictatorship mindset..........?

Well, what that OB didn't know was she was speaking with a smart, independent woman who knows that the best thing for her was to run, not walk, out of that office and find someone who will listen to her desires and work "WITH" her ( Team philospophy).

I certainly know that the Midwife route is not for all women, as much as it should be for all healthy women! However, what I would love to see in my lifetime is all women demanding more from their OBs. If you are healthy, having a "perfectly" healthy pregnancy, it "ain't rocket science". By that I mean your birth day should not be so over managed, unless that is what you want. If your desire is to be a passive participant, go for it. However, do your research, really think about how you would like your birth to go. It is really a remarkably spiritual time in your where you should be an active participant, don't let it be diminished down to the same level as say.......having your tooth pulled, setting a broken arm, rhinoplasty, boob job, brain surgery, or hysterectomy. When you need or want those things, yea, you look for the best, most skilled surgeon and let him or her have at it! "Wake me when it's over..." is all you're thinking!

At least start out on your journey with a partner (provider) who is interested in what you want. I get it to all you naysayers! It goes without saying............all in the realm of safety. I don't think you could find midwives, or OBs who are anymore concerned and safety driven as we are at Reunion. And I know that not all women are destined to have a natural birth......some desperately need assistance and interventions.....and we are so blessed as midwives to have such a great team of collaborative OBs who support fully what we do. They sponsor us for our privileges at Kingwood hospital so that when our moms need epidural, help with their power ( ie Pitocin), or need a cesarean section we are able to provide those things with a "wink of an eye" .

The scenario I presented in the beginning was one that someone told me about yesterday. It happened to her, and she could not get out of that office fast enough. It wasn't just about what was said to her, but "HOW" it was said. No respect.

I ask, how do they get away with it! What makes a female OB feel so completely OK with speaking to another woman like that? In essence, you have no say over what is going to happen.....I am in charge! Deal with it. Well, guess what? She did. She did her research, got reccomendations, and is putting her team together! Go momma. You just started your journey on the road of motherhood!

For now......Janet

Monday, May 3, 2010

Letting go down a different path.....

Sometimes letting go means giving up control over the course our body wants and sometimes needs to take.

Last night, instead of coaching a mom to "let go" and let her baby come down and out, I was speaking softly to our mom of how she had come to a point in her journey of pregnancy and birth where it would be best for her to "let go" of the idea of what she had planned for herself and her babe.....natural birth at the birth center. Her journey took a different that was doable. Just not as planned. Always remember, sometimes a cesarean section is the completely best thing for you, given certain circumstances.

This mom is a warrior, brave and committed to doing the best for herself and her babe. Sometimes life throws you a can be scary.....scary-scary. I am proud of you momma. What you had to go through and are still going through (recovery) is tough, but you have done it. You kept it together with the loving support of your ever faithful husband. My hat is off to you. You have a handsome tough little boy! He's gonna be fun and work!

So, please, mommas, know that sometimes birth is so much about letting go and getting on with it. The most important thing is mom and babe are healthy.....For now...Janet

Saturday, May 1, 2010

The "Mother Call"

This week I again had the honor of witnessing and guiding a young mom through her work of labor and birth......I cannot express the power and feelings present in the room when women are at their strongest and most glorious........incredible strength, beauty, tenacity wisdom and most of all love. A mother's love. Three simple words said so many times by so many people.
I have a great job.....a calling if you will. God has granted me this part of my life, however long it may be, to be witness of his perfect plan....can't say that enough.

Watching a woman work with her body and the design of it....easing through those hours of early labor which progresses ever so nicely into powerful active labor is always a wonderment. And when she gets just to that point of almost being done with her task....she starts the "mother call" . If she feels safe and undisturbed and in a perfect place she can "let go" and call her baby home. I must admit, when guiding women through that time I find myself brought to such emotion and respect and awe that I must fight back the tears for her......not feeling sorry, but feeling so incredibly honored to witness such a miracle! Yes, again I think! Just as He planned!

If you are not"privvy" to that may think "oh my horrible for her" The loud moaning, the deep gutteral "aaahhhhhhh". But no, she is calling her baby.....calling her down
and out and into her arms. Maybe God planned for all of us at that moment of our birth to hear that sound and go towards it....For we should not discourage it but behold it as our golden moment......Ever so spiritual, powerful, miraculous......birth as it should be.

I welcome, anyone who is afraid to give it a try.......scared, discouraged.....Let us help will be amazed by your courage and have only just begun to tap into!

As midwives our strength is the ability to know what you need at each step of the way. No lie, no bullshit.....hard core facts and guidedance. And LOVE. Our hands and hearts are our tools. The best drug in town, I guarrantee it! For now.....Janet